The dedication

The Girl By The Window...

The cool night air blew very gently, its presence made perceptible by the lazily swaying leaves on the rows of trees that stood on either sides of the road. A lone dark figure stood under the wide canopy of the trees, resolutely still, almost blending into the night, although a few stray shafts of moonlight fell on the unmoving shape and gave away its incongruity. It started moving then, not along the road but away from it, away from the shelter of the trees into the open space on the right side of the road. The dark figure, now bathed completely in moonlight was dark no more, revealing a disarmingly handsome young man.

He moved swiftly across the open field, almost gliding over the soft untended grass, his steps barely disturbing anything that came in their way. He had never ventured this far into the field before. For him to be in the open for this long and hence exposed without the shelter of the canopied road and the woods beyond was highly unusual and fraught with risks. But tonight his intentions too were very unusual and worth every possible risk. The field ended abruptly with a sturdy concrete fence topped with barbed wire mesh. The fence actually belonged to an old two-storey brick house and covered the entire perimeter of the property except for an imposing wrought iron gate that occupied a part of one of the edges of the fence. The house marked the beginning of a small sparse civilisation that became more prominent as one moved further, away from the woods. The young man however stood next to the barb-wired fence gazing up at the brick house uncaring of the rest of the civilisation in that area or the world for that matter. He was still exposed but least bit worried about being seen since he was sure he wasn’t. He took a step towards the fence and then hesitated. For the first time in a very long time he was plagued by an inert uncertainty. Like the others that had preceded this feeling he wanted to ponder over it. But now was not the time. Besides, this uncertainty was, unlike the others, less persistent and least bit daunting. It was no consolation though. They had become recurrent, these sensations, intangible manifestations that left him brooding for hours with no significant success of coming up with explanations. They arose deep within his perpetual and carnal coldness; his inherent, prevailing and tangible coldness. They questioned his frigid resolve and he was at a loss for answers. They washed over him like unpredictable waves and left him helplessly drenched. It took him a while to accept the inevitable and give in.

He gazed particularly at a lone open window of the upper storey on his side of the house. A soft yellow light emanated from between the curtains that obscured most of the window. A whirlwind of thoughts still dominated his mind. He thought of how easily he had been relinquishing his cold demeanour and inner rigidity and surrendering to the unexplained, all-pervading warmth, lately. How uncomplicated, how much better this surrender was. The sight of the dimly glowing window only fuelled his strange resolution that had so successfully conquered him tonight. All hesitation, reservation and stray misgivings forgotten, the young man bent his knees slightly. With surreal grace and agility he jumped straight up in the air, high over the fence, up till he reached the window level and then landed lightly on the thin strip of ledge that stuck out of the wall just below the window. He crouched on one corner of the ledge so that the shadow fell on the wall and not inside the window. He was still for a while, listening. The breeze gained some strength and fluttered the curtains opening them up a bit wider. The moon was hidden by a stray cloud for a while blanketing everything with momentary darkness. The cloud then drifted away and the moonlight fell upon the house, the curtains and found its way through the gap into the dimly lit room. The silvery white light fell on things closest to the window inside the room. One corner of a purple rug, a pair of white fluffy bunny slippers and finally the bed on which lay the reason why the young man had broken the pattern, broken the unwritten rules, forgone caution and reason and was crouching on the thin ledge listening to the slow breathing and the rhythmic beating of the heart. So strange, yet so familiar were those musical sounds of life. A warm life, a mortal life, a life that belonged to this beautiful creature curled up on the bed.

She looked serene and peaceful in her sleep, her dark lustrous hair curling every which way, entangled and tousled. He gazed at the face he had seen so many times in the past few weeks and yet it gave rise to a surge of warm sensations as if he were seeing this beautiful human for the first time in his life. Her features weren’t the most perfect; he had seen far more beautiful and perfect faces before. Yet, none of them had broken through his coldness so powerfully without even trying. For him she was exquisite. He had witnessed a lot of expressions playing across her face before. She enthralled and intrigued him. That one night he had ventured to the edge of the field near the canopied road had changed things more than he had expected. It was late yet she had stood by the window, staring into the moonlit night not unlike this one. He had just glanced in her direction fleetingly and gone back to his meticulous way of closing in on his sighted prey. Her face, then displaying an unfathomable sadness, had sprung up before his eyes while he was trying to concentrate on his prey’s furtive movements. Distracted and vaguely irritated he had turned to look at her again just in time to see a single tear sliding down her cheek, sparkling in the moonlight. The prey was instantly forgotten. His visits to the edge of the field had become frequent after that. He stayed at the edge each time but he could see her clearly whenever she came near the window. Each time her face captivated him. Sometimes it was riveted as she sat next to the window and read novels (many a times The Twilight Saga, Vampire Diaries... how ironic...), sometimes anxious as she pored over text books, her lips mouthing words soundlessly, sometimes joyous as her melodious laughter rang out when she talked over the phone twisting a stray curl absently with her finger, sometimes relaxed as she listened to her favourite songs and sometimes wistful as she gazed at the stars and sighed thinking of her mysterious wishes that he would give anything to know and do whatever he could to fulfil them.

He continued gazing at her face, her curling lashes, her small nose, the curve of her cheeks, her majestic chin and the slight smile on her soft lips. He breathed in then and along with the faint homely smell of her room there came the smell of lavenders, roses, her hair and the heady sweet human scent tinged with the unmistakable metallic hint of warm flowing blood. He revelled in it as it added to her extraordinary inner and outer beauty. The moonlight was casting an ethereal glow on her skin but she seemed to glow with innocence and goodness from the inside. He wanted to give this lovely girl a name. He had heard other people in the house call her name a couple of times. The voices were muffled and from the distance he had heard only a part of her name. Her true name could be anything; Elizabeth, Elise, Lizzy, Eloise... but the partly discernable name he had heard sounded perfect for her. He decided then that that was what he would call her. Not loudly, but in his heart and mind, whenever he remembered her, because he wanted to keep her memory afresh even though her body would eventually grow frail and wither away. He wanted the name for this fascinating girl with so many expressions, thoughts, hopes and dreams. He wanted the name as it would remind him of the precious and fragile humanity that he possessed before he was mercilessly plunged into perpetual coldness. He wanted the name that gave way to that strange warmth which won over his frigidity. Sitting on the ledge he smiled too, mimicking her and marvelled at the intensity behind the simple expression. He continued looking at her, breathing deeply again, absorbed in her beauty while Liza slept on...